Optimal Living

Vulnerability | Why Being Vulnerable Helps

I think the phase of my life I started being vulnerable or opening up to people around, it changed my life. Because of many incidences that occurred in our lives, we lose trust in people or start to believe it is better not to bother people with our issues.

I remember a time, I shut people out of my life completely. All I was surrounded by were my troubles. I didn’t want to share this part of me with anyone because I thought it was pathetic, people might judge or feel pity for me. I thought what happened to me were flaws in my life, I definitely had low self-love back then.


Growing Up SHY!

I started my college years and made a friend or a few. I missed the old people in my life that I neglected due to the fear of rejection. I was still discovering myself and maybe trying to love myself whole, along with all my flaws and issues. As I began to learn to be vulnerable, I started loving all my flaws, I made peace with my past. With the help of people around who loved me no matter what I conquered most of the fears, I had in life.

The situations that happen to us aren’t in our control but we always feel ashamed to ask for help emotionally or share our lows. We raise our guards too high for anyone to enter but it emotionally and mentally drains us. Eventually, we are living in a society where we need each other’s love and support.

self love

You learn to choose people wisely

Sure, you have set your guards high but slowly measure the amount of trust you can put on every person. For you then having a small number of close people you can trust completely is enough. You can share or be totally yourself with them and they wouldn’t mind. They always lift you up, support, motivate and guide you. They allow you to fully accept yourself.

You learn to let go

If you are constantly keeping things to yourself, you are still living in the past thinking about the time that did you wrong. You let the past determine your future actions, decisions and the kind of people you want in your life. You fail to fully live.

Vulnerability in you allows you to let go of the past. Sure it harmed you and made you who you are today. But you are proud of yourself and you don’t make choices considering what happened in your past. You become wise and learn from it.

You make genuine connections

When you open up to people, they can resonate with you. They trust you back. And this connection is priceless. People up for taking advantage of someone’s emotional state have problems in them. But that shouldn’t stop you from being vulnerable as there are others who will appreciate you being honest and credible. So many go through similar phases in life that you learn to empathize with them. And empathy is such a powerful ability.


You become more approachable

You don’t look like a robot with zero emotions. And acting to be reckless emotionless doesn’t help your mental health or self-growth. When you display emotions, share your experience, people understand you.

You learn to listen to yourself

I know how I was up for helping everyone else but myself when I feared vulnerability. I no more push down how I feel or suppress my emotions. Ignoring your true self is like consciously harming yourself. And then there’s no point of not being vulnerable when you are in fact your biggest enemy. It is best, to be honest with yourself.

Why You Should Talk To Yourself

Vulnerability makes you stronger

I to this day struggle a lot with trust, confidence and more but I always feel that vulnerability has made me stronger and resilient. Once you are true to yourself and maybe share your problems it helps you overcome the shortcomings in your life. Everything that doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, believe it really. An obstacle is just that, an obstacle, it is not the end of the world.



It increases your self-worth

You understand that everybody has similar needs and insecurities. So what you feel and need are valid. A certain amount of validation is built in yourself and it increases your self-worth. Everybody deserves help and support to deal with life.

You take control of your life

You become more aware of your emotions, thoughts, and actions. And you learn more than anyone else you are responsible for yourself. You never sit there and blame, you pick up your life and walk away. You know what’s better for you.

How to be Independent

You don’t feel lonely anymore

Not going to lie, I spend most of my time alone. But it is far different from being lonely. When I had no one to talk to, share my thoughts and feelings I really felt lonely. But now with the strongest bonds with people in my life, I feel fulfilled. I can turn to them anytime, I know they will be there for me.

How lovely it is to be vulnerable? It is rather a strength in you. How vulnerable are you? Would love to read your comments!


Thanks for reading! Hope it helps.






18 thoughts on “Vulnerability | Why Being Vulnerable Helps

  1. I too grew up shy and always was to myself. I don’t think being shy is a bad thing at all because you observe other people and choose the ones that you can trust.

  2. Whats so funny is when I was younger I did not pay that much attention who I surrounded myself with but now that I’m older… I do alot of these things!!! So interesting!

  3. You definitely do learn a lot about the world when you open yourself up to it. I have always been a generally open person but with reasonable limitations.

  4. this is such a beautifully well written & insightful post… my sister fits a lot of your descriptions of yourself… I’m definitely going to pass this on to her

  5. This is an excellent post that I think everyone needs to hear. Back when I was much younger I was constantly being taken advantage of by people and many times I suffered verbal abuse as well, which made me less wanting to be vulnerable. However, as I healed and was able to open up to more people, I was able to understand and relate to people better.

  6. Although I’m totally grown – in every sense – there are moments when a mindless sentence just hits me. In addition, I’m getting angry at myself for letting things get me; things that absolutely not worth it….

  7. This is something I really need to work on. I am very good at closing off and not connecting with others… This is a good reminder to work on that more, especially at this time of year. There are so many people to reconnect with during the holidays.

  8. This is such an interesting read. I’ve.m never been a shy person but I work with clients who often feel vulnerable and taken advantage of. I will change the conversation to show how it is a strength and can be used to their advantage. Thank you
    Misty | notanotherthing.com

  9. It can be so difficult to be open yourself up because –just as you’re open to good things– you’re also open to bad things. And that really scares people, as it should. It’s great to take steps to learn to get over said things and really be vulnerable as you’ve pointed out.

    Thanks for sharing! x


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