What are the emotional obstacles you feel the most and almost give in to the feeling? It is worst as they are something that destroys us from within. And so we need to conquer over these emotional enemies from within.
Emotions like fear, hopelessness, jealousy, and anger can’t bring us any good. They eat us from inside out becoming an obstacle for us to achieve things in our lives.
Firstly, you have to accept your emotions and not deny it. It is not healthy to either store the emotions in or never yourself accept how you feel. This burden might not harm you today but with time it will create an enormous amount of emotional baggage. It can lead you to make wrong decisions, having to regret some choices or regret not doing something, wasting time on being sad when you could do better and keep you from living your best life.
Let’s take a look at a few common ones that have the most impact on our daily life and how to overcome them.
Also, a note that I am in no way any kind of a professional or expert but the ways or tips come out through my own experiences and what I have learned to cope with my own emotional hindrances.
We can be destructive when in anger. So before calculating how much the situation or person makes you angry, you should consider the extent of your anger and damage that your anger can cause. Maybe look at the bigger picture.
Express your anger calmly. Don’t speak when you are angry. Refuse to make any communication. You might say hurtful things that you may regret later. So take a timeout. Try to find solutions and not let it bother you much. When you think that it will not matter to you in a year’s time it will help you to not hold grudges. Silence or choosing to be silent will be the best when you are all fired up.
Avoid making decisions when you are tensed. Express how you feel. Don’t stick with the feeling but try to find a solution. Practice deep breathing and try to calm your nerves. Worrying doesn’t help anyone and repeating what has gone wrong, how things went wrong won’t help you either.
You can easily slip into the chain of ‘what if’ thoughts but you have to eliminate all the ‘what can go wrong’ to go to ‘how to take control of the situation’ mind. Take control of the things that are in your set of management, take control of your emotions, become aware of your thought process. If you are not thinking positively then you should not take on any work or step towards fixing things.
If there is something immediate you need to handle then you should shut your thoughts and take actions with the help of others. Be patient with what you are facing as it is the only way out.
If you have anxiety (like me) it is so hard to go about the day without feeling a bit scared to do certain things. Sometimes going out, talking to a stranger or having an impromptu meet with someone or as little as having to attend a call unprepared can all get you so scared that you could run away from the situation screaming.
Again breathing works! Stop imagining things but only expect good things to happen. Acceptance goes a long way here too. Once you accept it control your thoughts that are repeating the fear and focus on how you really want to conquer the fear. If you have to conquer bigger fears it would be effective to take little steps towards it.
My mum always told me ‘as long as it doesn’t kill you’ and I have applied the idea to every situation I become anxious about. You start thinking ‘oh what have I got to lose’ and then just already get past the feeling.
When you are sad about something, you want to bring the whole world down with you. Is the feeling very strong or are you giving the feeling power to take control over your mind? Failure, loss, and breakups are part of life. You don’t have to move on from it the very next day. But also harboring the feeling of sadness for a longer period can lead to depression.
When you decide to let go of sadness there are many ways you will be able to get past the emotion. The will for it will definitely pave the way. It all comes down to having the right mindset. Talk to people, if that doesn’t help take help from an expert who can guide you right. Shift your thoughts to immediate things or keep a broader view.
Again when you feel sad you have to accept it. Maybe even cry it out. Don’t try to hide it or pretend everything is okay. Maybe expressing how you feel will become a way of letting go.
This happens quite often to anyone as even when you are at home with absolutely no human around you still can feel jealous while scrolling through social media accounts on your phone. Also, yet again when you are talking to yourself accept that you are jealous.
The world is competitive and it is totally natural for us to try to go one step ahead of our competitors. It encourages us to do better. But jealousy and comparing yourself to others only makes us feel bad about ourselves and mentally make a list of things we lack or fail at.
The emotion can be conquered with just the simple act of being grateful. Appreciate and acknowledge how far you have made it. Start to be more happy with what you already have, not just materialistically or wealth wise but also with your health, relationships and day to day tasks. Sometimes you just have to stop from looking at what could be better in my life to what could be worse and be thankful to all that you are able to enjoy.
As dynamic as every individual is their lives and achievements are bound to differ.
Attachment to someone, to something and some ways, should be dealt with if it hinders your progress in life. I can’t go on without them. I can’t do without it. I have always done things this way.
This is totally made up in our minds. This belief can be instantly altered as soon as we discover something better and more efficient of people or otherwise. We think that there is no other way, there is no other person or no other thing that can replace what we are so attached to unless you search.
When something is not working out for you but you are still attached to it, it is better for you to look for something else. You are chained to things that bring you down or doesn’t allow progress in your life and the sooner you realize these attachments the better it will be to turn away from them and make some improvements in life.
The key is to know yourself better. Practice meditation and breathing to find peace with your own mind. Know your inner desires. Start defining your personality. Ask yourself often how you feel about things.
Increase your knowledge in any and many ways possible. This will boost your confidence and make you feel more in control of situations. Exercising and being fit can help you boost your confidence as well. It freshens up your mind and allows you to have a quick opinion and control as you feel like you possess control over your body.
Learn how your indecisiveness affects you and people around you. This will help you remind yourself why you should be more resolute with certain choices. Have a stream of consciousness journal perhaps, that can help you know the inner and deep urges that will help you make quick decisions.
Give yourself a deadline to decide on things. Little subjects should be taken care of as quick as possible. Major matters should take longer but establish a deadline so that you do end up making a decision and not postpone or be undetermined forever. Take as many suggestions you need from people or even let a few others share their perspective and share their decisions with you. However, you, in the end, have to make the final call.
Maybe go with your gut feeling! Understand that whatever decision you make may or may not work out it is part of life and decision-making process but it helps you learn and gives you experience allowing you to be braver with decisions later.
Helpless and hopelessness
You feel more helpless when you are more dependent and like mentioned before too attached to things and people. When you are helpless people make choices for you and you end up regretting it. There are almost a large number of people who still believe that life situations are not under their control and whatever happens they are bound to suffer from it. Partly, I believe that life does throw random circumstances that ‘You Have To Deal With’.
When such a circumstance arises people usually become hopeless and give up their dreams and desires. ‘I am the creator of my own destiny and I can handle any situation.’ Maybe believe in these positive affirmations and repeat it to yourself.
To a point, many are so comfortable in this hopeless feeling that they bask in its misery. Life doesn’t have to be like that you can push and try till you succeed. Maybe give my video on Hope a watch to restore hope in life and yourself!
This is a very holistic post. Do you think I should delve deeper into one of these emotions we face and how to overcome them? What are some of your experiences with these mentioned emotions? Did I skip any emotion that you would like to overcome? Let’s discuss down in the comments section. xoxo
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Thanks for reading! Hope it helps. <3